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Oh, and welcome to America!”“Thank you. It’s good to be back home!”I knew that. Every time I came back from India I had to pick up my luggage and let the Customs people paw through my clothes. And equipment. And souvenirs. Off to one side of the Customs area there was a similar area for everyone who didn’t carry a US passport.I waved my hand at the girls and said ‘Come’, whistling ‘Immigration Man’ by the Beatles. No, they did ‘Tax Man’. I couldn’t remember who did ‘Immigration Man’. “Look at the world outside and let me in!”The girls both spoke perfect English. Anyone from England would say they spoke it better than me. Tough, we weren’t in England and I spoke American like the native I was. When among strangers, though, the girls usually pretended to not understand English and I thought that wise.Luggage was the usual crowd, the long wait, and the fight over who got theirs first. There was no option to simply wait until everyone else was done, as long before that there would be. ‘Well, it’s obvious that this didn’t work out as planned, Leo. However, I really don’t see how it’s my fault.’ ‘Whaddya fucking mean, you don’t see how this was your fuckingfault? These were your fucking wishes!’ ‘No, Leo. They were your, um, ‘fucking wishes’. Both figuratively and literally. You wished for addictive semen, the capacity for unlimited male orgasms, and a box of Cuban cigars that was never empty.’ He paused. ‘How did that one work out for you, by the way?’ ‘I don’t fucking know!’ Leo shouted. ‘I never get to smoke ’em any-fucking-more because I’m stuck in this fucking room twenty-fucking-four hours a fucking day!’ Mikal held up his hands. ‘Now, Leo. Anger doesn’t help, here. And I don’t actually think ‘any-fucking-more’ is gramatically correct. I just wanted to point out that you specified that the semen be addictive, and it performed exactly as specified. I’m not responsible if you didn’t think about what addicts could be like when they got desperate.’ ‘So you’re not.
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